This week went a lot better. Probably because I stopped freaking out about it being the first week of teaching. And also because it appears my students decided (for the moment at least) to actually complete their reading assignments.
That being said, I did have one OMG moment this week.
I have one student, let's call him Jim, who hasn't shown up to class at the University. My classes there are MW classes only. And because the first week we had MLK day, we started on Wednesday. So, we've had 3 total class periods. He missed the first and second. He shows up on the third, only after his roommate, who also happens to be in the class, told him that he had to come talk to me about why he had yet to show up. (His roommate had informed me during our second class meeting that he was his roommate, and I asked him to have him come talk to me.)
So, he comes to class. He sits in the front row, RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME, and refuses to participate. He won't speak. He didn't even write the short in-class writing assignment I had them do. He sat there doodling on his notebook.
He comes up to me after class and says he came today because his roommate said he had to talk to me. The conversation went something like this (and yes, I am correcting some of the grammar in some spots):
Me: So, where have you been the last week and a half?
J: My Mom was sick.
Me: You're going to have to give me more than that. I don't mean to pry in your personal business, but if you're going to be missing a week's worth of class, I need more information.
J: Well, she has arthritis.
My head: Um, WTF?
Me: And her arthritis caused you to miss a week of classes?
J: Well, she had an attack in the car.
[Let's just ignore the fact that people do not have arthritis "attacks" and keep going.]
Me: So?
J: Well, my Dad had to go get her. And she called me. And then I had to talk to my Dad. (and I'm pretty sure he said something about going to a hospital--wth.)
Me: And these phone calls took a week and a half? And had to occur during your class time?
J: Well, no. The rest of the week I've been trying to get my books and stuff.
Me: It doesn't take a week to buy books. And the book store is open around our class times. And other students have managed to come to class without books, get the assignments done, and participate. So you still need to come.
J: Okay.
Me: You're only allowed 4 absences for the semester. You've used two. You're not being excused for those. In the future, if you do have a legitimate emergency, you need to let me know, prior to class time.
J: Okay.
Me: And you should probably access a copy of the syllabus on [the online class system] to see the full course policies and readings/assignments schedule.
He left. WTF. Arthritis attack? Had to buy his books? Does he think I'm that stupid? I'll bet he fails. Or withdraws.
Friday, January 28, 2011
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Week One: Mildly Successful
While I cannot say that the first week of classes has set flame to some heretofore unknown desire for developing young minds, I do have to admit that it was not a complete and total bust. Shall we say it was alright?
One of my classes at the college was great, one was painful. One of the my classes and the university was acceptable, the other was . . . well, it was. That's about all I can say about it. Now, do I anticipate it will get better? Yes. Do I expect that they'll all turn out to to be fantastic, blow-you-away, change the course of your life amazing? Nope. Not so much.
I need to figure out how to teach a hour and a half class. Up until this point, all of my experience has been with 50 minute classes or independent studies. So this hour and a half (or hour and 15 minutes, depending on the school) is not working out well for me.
Well, I shouldn't say that. When the students are responsive and into the discussions, so far it's been great. But when they are reticent, withdrawn, disengaged and [most likely] unprepared (by nature of not reading the material) it is really, really painful.
When I was in college, for a long time, I was shy. I didn't like to speak up in class, unless I expected to say something to amaze the whole room. I actually "apologized" to one of my old instructors today for any time that I wasn't very talkative or didn't participate in class. Cuz let me tell you, it's really difficult to be on the other side of the shut-down classroom.
I'm excited about the material, and I had enough material to fill an entire class period. But it's really hard to give something back to students who aren't giving you anything to work with.
I said this semester was going to be my experiment. I told my husband: if I like it, I'm going to get my PhD. If I don't like it, then I need to do a serious re-evaluation of my life choices, finally pick a path, and go after it with gusto. He's all on board. Now I just have to be.
One of my classes at the college was great, one was painful. One of the my classes and the university was acceptable, the other was . . . well, it was. That's about all I can say about it. Now, do I anticipate it will get better? Yes. Do I expect that they'll all turn out to to be fantastic, blow-you-away, change the course of your life amazing? Nope. Not so much.
I need to figure out how to teach a hour and a half class. Up until this point, all of my experience has been with 50 minute classes or independent studies. So this hour and a half (or hour and 15 minutes, depending on the school) is not working out well for me.
Well, I shouldn't say that. When the students are responsive and into the discussions, so far it's been great. But when they are reticent, withdrawn, disengaged and [most likely] unprepared (by nature of not reading the material) it is really, really painful.
When I was in college, for a long time, I was shy. I didn't like to speak up in class, unless I expected to say something to amaze the whole room. I actually "apologized" to one of my old instructors today for any time that I wasn't very talkative or didn't participate in class. Cuz let me tell you, it's really difficult to be on the other side of the shut-down classroom.
I'm excited about the material, and I had enough material to fill an entire class period. But it's really hard to give something back to students who aren't giving you anything to work with.
I said this semester was going to be my experiment. I told my husband: if I like it, I'm going to get my PhD. If I don't like it, then I need to do a serious re-evaluation of my life choices, finally pick a path, and go after it with gusto. He's all on board. Now I just have to be.
Monday, January 17, 2011
I'm definitely not getting any sleep tonight.
I start my first day of teaching tomorrow. And I. AM. FREAKING. OUT.
Just thought I'd share.
Just thought I'd share.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Let's wax philosophic.
Since I spent my last post lamenting about leaving KMart, I thought I'd continue my melodramatic theme into this one.
If you're someone who likes to teach (and I think I am) then you're someone who likes to see others succeed, rather than needing all of the success for yourself. If your students are successful, then you are too. I'm not someone who necessarily defines success as a high-status job with a heavy paycheck. I didn't go to grad school to get a Master's degree to be able to do anything with it. Mostly, I was in the right place at the right time, and quite frankly, I just love being in school. I love learning. And teaching freshmen composition? I've been guaranteed I'll never stop learning new things. But what do I hope to teach? I'm not naive enough to think that most of my students don't have a predisposition to hate my class. It's English. Mostly, they hate it. They find it boring, irksome, and tedious. And a good portion of them wouldn't know what those last 2 descriptors even mean.
So, do I hope to teach them something? Even through that prejudice? Of course I do. When I stop losing hope that I can teach my students anything, then I'll stop pursuing teaching. I just don't necessarily hope to teach them the kinds of things they expect to learn.
If I have to choose what they learn (and even though I design what I want to teach, it doesn't necessarily directly reflect what they will learn), these would fall somewhere on that list:
Good writers are not born. Good writers develop. They teach themselves. They write all the time. And that's truly the only way to become a better writer. Every skill requires practice. Even singers born with amazing voices have to train them. Even athletes born with significant abilities practice and condition to become better. Writing is the same way. You can't improve if all you do it sit around and bemoan that you're a terrible writer.
Related to that, good writing never happens on a first draft. NEVER. You may think that you're first draft is pretty phenomenal, and it may be good, but it will always benefit from revision. Writing is never truly "finished." There's just a deadline to turn it in. You shouldn't expect to produce a perfect paper on a first try, and expecting that from yourself is one of the worst causes of writer's block. Start somewhere, anywhere. Get something on paper. Then build on it.
You are not a "bad" writer. You're not "bad" at English. If you truly believe that you're just always going to be bad at English, someone, somewhere failed you.
Good writers are good readers. The two are inseparable. If you want to become a better writer, then become a better reader. It's a fact that we best learn and understand language through immersion. So immerse yourself in the English language. Yes you've been speaking it your whole life, but spoken language differs from written language on many levels. To be a better writer, you have to read good writing.
Good grammar does not equivocate to good writing. The end. Every great writer has had a great editor, too.
We read and write every single day. Any student who tells me that they're "never going to use this stuff again" after a composition course better be prepared to be laughed at. We do it all the time. What is Facebook? Twitter? MySpace (does anyone actually use MySpace anymore)? Texting? It's all social networking. Networking that requires communication. It's amazing to me that students today can type 140 characters, click a button, and reach millions of people around the world. And they tell me they're never going to use the things they learn in my class? Sure, facebooking and tweeting does not require MLA or APA documentation. But it is a form of writing. A form of writing that has it's own form, rules, and even language. That's what I teach in my class: How to determine the type of writing needed, the audience you're trying to reach, the methods to go about communicating what you want to say, and the language needed to be clear and concise. Never going to need the skills I'm trying to show you? BALDERDASH.
If you're someone who likes to teach (and I think I am) then you're someone who likes to see others succeed, rather than needing all of the success for yourself. If your students are successful, then you are too. I'm not someone who necessarily defines success as a high-status job with a heavy paycheck. I didn't go to grad school to get a Master's degree to be able to do anything with it. Mostly, I was in the right place at the right time, and quite frankly, I just love being in school. I love learning. And teaching freshmen composition? I've been guaranteed I'll never stop learning new things. But what do I hope to teach? I'm not naive enough to think that most of my students don't have a predisposition to hate my class. It's English. Mostly, they hate it. They find it boring, irksome, and tedious. And a good portion of them wouldn't know what those last 2 descriptors even mean.
So, do I hope to teach them something? Even through that prejudice? Of course I do. When I stop losing hope that I can teach my students anything, then I'll stop pursuing teaching. I just don't necessarily hope to teach them the kinds of things they expect to learn.
If I have to choose what they learn (and even though I design what I want to teach, it doesn't necessarily directly reflect what they will learn), these would fall somewhere on that list:
Good writers are not born. Good writers develop. They teach themselves. They write all the time. And that's truly the only way to become a better writer. Every skill requires practice. Even singers born with amazing voices have to train them. Even athletes born with significant abilities practice and condition to become better. Writing is the same way. You can't improve if all you do it sit around and bemoan that you're a terrible writer.
Related to that, good writing never happens on a first draft. NEVER. You may think that you're first draft is pretty phenomenal, and it may be good, but it will always benefit from revision. Writing is never truly "finished." There's just a deadline to turn it in. You shouldn't expect to produce a perfect paper on a first try, and expecting that from yourself is one of the worst causes of writer's block. Start somewhere, anywhere. Get something on paper. Then build on it.
You are not a "bad" writer. You're not "bad" at English. If you truly believe that you're just always going to be bad at English, someone, somewhere failed you.
Good writers are good readers. The two are inseparable. If you want to become a better writer, then become a better reader. It's a fact that we best learn and understand language through immersion. So immerse yourself in the English language. Yes you've been speaking it your whole life, but spoken language differs from written language on many levels. To be a better writer, you have to read good writing.
Good grammar does not equivocate to good writing. The end. Every great writer has had a great editor, too.
We read and write every single day. Any student who tells me that they're "never going to use this stuff again" after a composition course better be prepared to be laughed at. We do it all the time. What is Facebook? Twitter? MySpace (does anyone actually use MySpace anymore)? Texting? It's all social networking. Networking that requires communication. It's amazing to me that students today can type 140 characters, click a button, and reach millions of people around the world. And they tell me they're never going to use the things they learn in my class? Sure, facebooking and tweeting does not require MLA or APA documentation. But it is a form of writing. A form of writing that has it's own form, rules, and even language. That's what I teach in my class: How to determine the type of writing needed, the audience you're trying to reach, the methods to go about communicating what you want to say, and the language needed to be clear and concise. Never going to need the skills I'm trying to show you? BALDERDASH.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Serenity
2010 has passed me by, and I'm not sure I've "done" alot. But I've certainly learned alot. And as a student of life, I suppose that's what matters.
As of January 14th, I will no longer be working at KMart. I have managed to secure 2 adjunct teaching positions in addition to the one I already have, so I will be teaching 5 sections of composition at 3 different colleges/universities. I'm a little excited, mostly terrified, but wanting to take on the challenge. This will be the first time I'm one-hundred percent responsible for what gets taught in my classroom. It's a big responsibility, and although I'm not worried that I won't be up to it, I am worried that I may realize it's not what I want to do with my life.
So that's my new year's resolution this year: Figure out what in the world I want to do with my life, and go after it with gusto.
But looking back on 2010, despite feeling like I spent most of it in limbo, I have grown, and I have grown up. Since 2011 may find me leaving my retail adventure behind completely, I want to reflect on what the last year and half of working at KMart has changed about me, and I want to commit some of the things I've learned to memory so that I take these lessons with me for life.
Never assume something about a person because of where they work. I may work at KMart, but that does not mean that I am uneducated, unmotivated, or lazy. Nor are [most of] my coworkers, all who have varying levels of education and life experience.
If you wouldn't want someone to speak to you a certain way, then don't speak to them that way. One of the most difficult parts about working in retail, for me, was learning to not take things personally. People are going to yell at you, call you names, stomp, stamp, and scream, throw adult tantrums and behave like undisciplined children. And while we don't have to just "stand there and take it" (we can call security or management), we cannot fight back. But would you want someone to come in to your place of work and scream, rant, and rave about something that is, quite honestly, completely outside of your control? Then don't do it at my place of work.
There is a ridiculous amount of stupidity in the world. And they're breeding.
When you are forced to choose between buying food and paying bills, any paycheck is a good paycheck.
You may be upset because something rung up wrong when you're checking out and it's taking a while for the cashier to do a price check. Or perhaps your layaway got canceled because you missed a payment. Or maybe you didn't bring ID and you can't pick up your layaway. Maybe the item you want is out of stock and we don't know when it will be replenished. Your day has just been inconvenienced. But that's all it is: an inconvenience. Would you still yell at that associate if you knew her grandfather has just died? Or her mom was sick?
I will never, ever again underestimate the value of kindness from strangers. It happens far, far too rarely.
Christmas is not the most wonderful time of the year. It has degenerated into a consumerist bloodbath where nothing is more important that spending as much money as possible on things that will break, be forgotten, or returned because they're unwanted.
No matter how many times you straighten something, it will always be undone within hours. But you will come back the next day and do it all over again.
The most fun I have at work has nothing to do with what I'm doing, but who I'm doing it with.
To find peace in wherever I am and whatever I am doing, I simply have to remember: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
As of January 14th, I will no longer be working at KMart. I have managed to secure 2 adjunct teaching positions in addition to the one I already have, so I will be teaching 5 sections of composition at 3 different colleges/universities. I'm a little excited, mostly terrified, but wanting to take on the challenge. This will be the first time I'm one-hundred percent responsible for what gets taught in my classroom. It's a big responsibility, and although I'm not worried that I won't be up to it, I am worried that I may realize it's not what I want to do with my life.
So that's my new year's resolution this year: Figure out what in the world I want to do with my life, and go after it with gusto.
But looking back on 2010, despite feeling like I spent most of it in limbo, I have grown, and I have grown up. Since 2011 may find me leaving my retail adventure behind completely, I want to reflect on what the last year and half of working at KMart has changed about me, and I want to commit some of the things I've learned to memory so that I take these lessons with me for life.
Never assume something about a person because of where they work. I may work at KMart, but that does not mean that I am uneducated, unmotivated, or lazy. Nor are [most of] my coworkers, all who have varying levels of education and life experience.
If you wouldn't want someone to speak to you a certain way, then don't speak to them that way. One of the most difficult parts about working in retail, for me, was learning to not take things personally. People are going to yell at you, call you names, stomp, stamp, and scream, throw adult tantrums and behave like undisciplined children. And while we don't have to just "stand there and take it" (we can call security or management), we cannot fight back. But would you want someone to come in to your place of work and scream, rant, and rave about something that is, quite honestly, completely outside of your control? Then don't do it at my place of work.
There is a ridiculous amount of stupidity in the world. And they're breeding.
When you are forced to choose between buying food and paying bills, any paycheck is a good paycheck.
You may be upset because something rung up wrong when you're checking out and it's taking a while for the cashier to do a price check. Or perhaps your layaway got canceled because you missed a payment. Or maybe you didn't bring ID and you can't pick up your layaway. Maybe the item you want is out of stock and we don't know when it will be replenished. Your day has just been inconvenienced. But that's all it is: an inconvenience. Would you still yell at that associate if you knew her grandfather has just died? Or her mom was sick?
I will never, ever again underestimate the value of kindness from strangers. It happens far, far too rarely.
Christmas is not the most wonderful time of the year. It has degenerated into a consumerist bloodbath where nothing is more important that spending as much money as possible on things that will break, be forgotten, or returned because they're unwanted.
No matter how many times you straighten something, it will always be undone within hours. But you will come back the next day and do it all over again.
The most fun I have at work has nothing to do with what I'm doing, but who I'm doing it with.
To find peace in wherever I am and whatever I am doing, I simply have to remember: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
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